Did God Join Us Together?

“Therefore, what GOD has joined...” (Matthew 19:6b).

It is commonly believed that every marriage between a man and a woman is “joined” by God and God’s blessings are on the marriage. We see from the Scriptures of Ezra, chapter 9 and 10, and Nehemiah, chapter 13 that this is just not true. Let me take this to an extreme to more clearly reveal this truth.

Would God come to a wedding of a man and a woman who are professing active worshipers of satan? Would God “witness” this marriage and pronounce His blessing on them when this couple actively serves another god and renounces the God of all creation? Do you think God would have a close intimate relationship with the devil and at the same time command us to “...have NO fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but ...[tells us to] ...expose them...” (Ephesians 5:11). Whatever God commands us to do, He Himself does.

Another type of marriage that God has no part of is a homosexual marriage. For “you shall not lie with a male as with a woman. IT IS AN ABOMINATION” (Leviticus 18:22). “Therefore, God also gave them up to uncleanness, in the lusts of their hearts, to dishonor their bodies among themselves ...for even their women exchanged the natural use for what is against nature. Likewise, also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust for one another, men with men committing what is shameful ...and they did not like to retain God in their knowledge...” (Romans 1:24,26-28). Do you think God actually joins these people in a holy marriage when He Himself condemns the marriage itself?

GOD DOES NOT JOIN TOGETHER WHAT HE DOES NOT APPROVE! However, He does allow a marriage to continue when one spouse gets saved provided that the spouse who is now His child is able to pursue a godly lifestyle with his or her children. In this case, the entire family is blessed; otherwise, divorce is in order.

The Scripture that commands us not to pull apart “what God has put together” deals with “what GOD has put together!” If God did not put the marriage together, we shouldn’t be in it in the first place. If we are in such a marriage, we can get out.

Each bad marriage has a different set of circumstances. Therefore, the guidelines are: you and your children must be safe and have a good environment at home; you must be able to fully pursue a devoted lifestyle to God. If this is the case, God will sanctify the marriage and the family because of the holy life of the godly spouse (See 1Corinthians 7:12-16).

Did We Join Ourselves Together?

If God did not join us together, then WE must have joined ourselves together. And if we chose to join ourselves together, we are not in a position to receive the same blessings on our marriage that God gives to a couple He has joined together.

God’s people who have “...married the daughter [or son] of a foreign god ...[they] cover the alter of the Lord with tears, with weeping and crying; so He [GOD] DOES NOT REGARD THE OFFERING [OF OUR PRAYERS] ANYMORE, NOR RECEIVE IT WITH GOODWILL FROM YOUR HANDS. Yet you say, ‘For what reason?’” (Malachi 2:11b, 13,14a). When there is a marriage or divorce that God does not approve of, we can be assured that God will not pronounce His blessing upon it, or answer our prayers, unless we repent and make right the situation that we did outside of His will.

Since “...there is NO authority except from God, and the authorities that exist are appointed by God” (Romans 13:1b), ONE CAN BE “JOINED TOGETHER” BY THE EXECUTORS OF GOD’S LAW WITHOUT RECEIVING THE BLESSINGS OF THE LAWGIVER HIMSELF.

If God does not “witness” a marriage, if it is not approved by Him, it doesn’t matter who we have to perform the wedding. It could be a justice of the peace, a judge, pastor, priest or whoever. If God does not approve it, it’s not approved! The state’s governing laws pertaining to age, citizenship, family relationship, or sex may approve the marriage. But these laws only govern a man from the outside. The Bible, God’s Word, governs a man from the inside, because it “...is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul [where a couple is joined together] and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12).

IF WE WANT OUR MARRIAGE TO BE BLESSED BY GOD, GOD MUST APPROVE OF OUR MARRIAGE, otherwise, we will receive the very minimum amount of blessings from God, if any. If we do not repent but continue in our stubbornness, we “are treasuring up for ...[ourselves] ...wrath ...” (Romans 2:5). Then we wonder why God allowed this to happen? How did we get into this terrible relationship anyway? We blame everybody but ourselves.


There are many critical keys in this book regarding divorce, remarriage, submission, interracial marriage and relationships. Click on Divorce: God's Will? to order.